"Gee," Spider-Gwen said, flipping back up to her feet. "That's a great question. How about... I dunno. You call my people, they'll call yours, maybe set up a nice meet and greet. We can get E! to cover the red carpet--"
Gwen threw herself off the building. She knew she was losing the lamp, but right now she had other things to worry about -- things like dark haired groupies made out of smoke and innuendo claiming to be her sex genie. With a gesture, she hooked a web line and sprung up high, shooting a second to pull her over the building to the other side. She curled in a ball and snapped out her wings again, letting herself glide a block before beginning web-slinging in earnest, looking to get distance and make it hard to find her.
Her spider sense was being quiet, which was a good sign. She was pretty sure Miss Boundaries would set it off if she could pursue. She hit ground in an alley, then sprung up to the underside of a fire escape. Hooking it she spun herself onto its railing and sprung onto the opposite building, then ran to the other side, jumped, and webslung heading for midtown.
She settled on a ledge overlooking Vanderbilt, breathing hard. She slumped back. Great. Fantastic. She saved the dumb old lamp from Sandman only to lose it to some newb with bewbs. This was the kind of screwup that stuck with a girl.
"Nah. You just have to accept the good and the bad." A dark beige handset the lamp next to Gwen.
Gwen shrieked, leaping back and off the ledge, diving for the street then firing off a line to do a last second swing and toss up to the side of a radio tower on top of a building.
"Stop running away," the girl shouted, hanging off the other side. "It doesn't work and besides, I'm hungry. Are you hungry? 'Course you're hungry. You know what? I can pay for the pizza."
Gwen turned to stare at 'Ovyah.' "What... the... Hell? Look, crazy lady. I'm not about to unmask and go eat dinner with--"
"Gwen Stacy, daughter of George Stacy. Drummer for the Mary Janes, though they're about to dump your pert ass for missing too many gigs. Ducking that psycho Castle of the N.Y.P.D. Your hair is layered with Splat pink you dilute to make it kind of a glassy pink, but the effect's more Corning Fiberglass Insulation than cotton candy. Do I have to go on or will you accept running's not an effective use of your time?"
Gwen stared at Ovyah for another long moment. "How the Hell did you get up here?"
"Teleported. Well, essentially I stopped existing where I was and started existing here. I can always do that where you're involved, 'cause you're my master. Mistress? No, that sounds weird. Master."
"...I'm... your master."
"Yup!"
"...because I rubbed a lamp. Because that happened."
"Yup!"
"Hard pass."
"You can't! You're my master 'till you die, and I'd rather that not be soon. I hadn't existed for a long time before that, and between you and me I'm none too sad that Sandman didn't get to grit up my cooch for the next however many centuries silica men live."
Gwen kept staring.
"Hello? I can hang here as long as you can. Technically, I don't even get tired, unless I do. It's situational."
"You can buy pizza?"
"Yeah. I mean, of course, I can. Pizza leads to dates. Dates lead to sex. Ergo, I can buy pizza. That's one of the freebie perks of the powerset."
"...the power... set?"
"Yup!"
Gwen took a deep breath. "All right. One pizza. No promises. And I don't put out for pizza no matter what your powerset says, and I'm not into girls even if I did."
"No worries. I'm your wingman."
"You so aren't my wingman." Gwen dropped off the tower, plummeting for the street. Truth be told, pizza sounded like a really good idea for all kinds of reasons.
They were in a back booth. Ovyah's clothes had changed to a torn 'Blisterpack' t-shirt and a leather skirt, with knee socks. She looked like an Indian punk rocker. Gwen was in a hoodie and looked surly.
Ovyah set the lamp down between them, though not on top of the pizza. "You were looking for this?"
"I was saving it from Sandman. Which I did. And now I'm going to give it back to the museum of antiquities. So sorry, but I guess you're going back too."
"Hm? Oh, no. The lamp doesn't matter anymore."
Gwen stared at Ovyah. "What?"
"You invoked me. I incarnated. I'm yours now until you die. The lamp's just sort of there. Blow it up if you like. It'll reform if you die and I have to go back to it."
"...so... I could have just let the Sandman have it and it wouldn't have mattered?"
"What? No. He'd have incarnated me instead, and he'd use my power to... I dunno. Rule Queens. Or the world. Or force everything into sex with him or whatever. But instead, you can rule Queens if you want."
"...wait. You said you're... a sex genie."
"Technically, a djinn of lust. Yeah."
"So... what can you do?"
"Grant you unlimited wishes of unlimited power... so long as they're... you know. Sex-based." She bit into her pizza. "MMmrraaah. Okay. This pizza counts as sex. You can make me summon this pizza at will because my mouth's orgasming right now!"
"...you're insane," Gwen said, taking a bit. "And it's fine but it's not that special."
"You try not having a mouth for twenty centuries and see how much you like your first bite of greasy cheese."
"You understand I think you're insane, right?" Gwen ate another piece of pizza. "I mean, that's just understood, right?"
"I accept those things I cannot control. It's rule number one of being eternal and situationally omnipotent."
"Okay. You're a genie -- or djinn or whatever. And I can wish for things, and you have to give them to me, but they only work if they're about sex. Or apparently pizza."
"Yes, senpai!"
"Fine. Great. I wish for Sam Guthrie to deliver me a pizza right here and right now, free of charge, while not wearing a shirt."
"Cool! Granted!"
"Wha--"
The doors to the kitchen pushed open, and Sam -- a young hero Gwen had met alongside the X-Men some time back -- walked out, shirtless, carrying a pizza on a tin plate which he put on the table.
Gwen stared. "Sam?!" She shook her head. "What the Hell are you doing here?"
"Pizza delivery. 'Scuse."
Gwen watched the X-Man walk back out, staring.
"So. Do you think I'm insane? Fine with me. You have to like the fringe benefits of my insanity, though." She frowned. "Are those mushrooms? Ugh. I don't know what you see in him. Hey -- you gonna finish that coke?"