She-Hulk clicked on her Internet browser and searched for stories on the White Rabbit. It seemed as if her mischievous little friend had gotten into a spot trouble, committing a bit of a crime wave across New York with her aptly named White Rabbit Gang. Their final heist target was at the Guggenheim Museum, or more specifically, an exhibit about the life and works of Lewis Carroll. She sought to steal the author’s pocket watch. Due to the Rabbit’s many fits of rage, it had seemed as if the sadly misunderstood Lorina Dodson had killed many of her fellow criminals in her gang, and had been forced to use robotic rabbits for the attempted heist. She would have gotten away with it too, had a security guard not tried to play hero. The White Rabbit had fired a razor-tipped carrot dart at the man from her weaponized umbrella. It had killed him instantly, and She-Hulk giggled at the absurdity of it all.
From there things really went south. The police and SWAT units surrounded the building, and the employees and patrons of the museum had been taken hostage. Jennifer Walters read on and found that Spider-Man and and Frog-Man had eventually found their way inside and managed to take out the rabbits, as well as the human members of the White Rabbit Gang.
“Rude,” Jennifer whispered, wrinkling her nose in disgust.
The White Rabbit herself had nearly managed to escape. She had ordered her dimwitted second-in-command, the Walrus, to charge at the two costumed heroes with an exploding carrot in his hands. The blast had knocked Frog-Man unconscious, but Spider-Man had managed to avoid any harm. The police found the female thief stuck to a wall inside the museum with Spider-Man’s web shooters.
The article contained a video of the White Rabbit in police custody, being loaded into a squad car. She was ranting and raving, and trying to fight her apprehension, It was clear to She-Hulk that the woman was quite mad.
“Not that there’s anything wrong with being mad,” She-Hulk whispered to herself and she grasped the meat cleaver by its handle. She managed to pry it out of the desk. The lawyer, heroine and newly-appointed Queen’s Justice started to gently chop the desk in time with the metronome.
‘Tock. Tock. Tock,’ sounded the metronome, and at the desk Jennifer Walters gently hacked away at her desk, ‘Chop. Chop. Chop.’
The She-Hulk played the video again, and when it ended she played it once more. She closed her eyes and could almost feel herself at the scene of this supposed crime. If only she was there, the Queen’s Justice thought to herself. She would have stepped in and saved the day.
The emerald-skinned woman exhaled a low, pleasurable sigh and fantasized about saving the White Rabbit from being manhandled by the brutish New York City police officers. When it looked like all hope was lost for the White Rabbit, the She-Hulk was suddenly there dressed in the unmistakable outfit of the Queen’s Justice. Her powerful green form on full display. The parts of her that were covered by clothing were encased in black, spiked latex and she carried a very large axe. To complete her menacing look, she wore a tight latex cowl with spikes at the crown of her head and a long, red-lined cape. The cowel revealed the lower portion of her face and had oval cut-outs that showcased her sinister eyes that were lined with black dramatic eyeliner. Her black-painted lips smiled an evil grin as she advanced upon the police officers manhandling the poor White Rabbit.
In the distance was the same crazed cry as before, “Off with their heads!”
With a wild, unhinged look in her mad eyes, the Queen’s Justice brought her axe high in the air. She swung it down using all of her considerable strength. The good men that were manhandling the White Rabbit barely had time to turn their heads to see the axe come down.
Jennifer Walters gasped out in utter pleasure, and she was brought back to the present. She looked down and saw that she had her hand buried in her crotch and she was rubbing herself. The warped woman sat back in her chair and continued to bring herself off with one hand as she chopped away at her desk with the other.
All the while the metronome that had been programmed by the Mad Hatter continued its siren song, and the heroine fell deeper and deeper into madness.
**********
Back at the Baxter Building, Johnny Storm felt the urge to get up and try to fix whatever was wrong with the TV, maybe even by hitting it. Reed and Sue always felt like fixing things through science, but Johnny found that sometimes giving an object a hard swat set things right. And yet he was far too relaxed to get up.
He continued to lay there eating his little cakes that Susan had given him. Every now and then the screen would shift from the action scene of the new movie to this wavy, glitching flickering pattern. At one point Johnny could have sworn he had even seen the most gorgeous woman he had ever seen with long white hair and a skintight pink and purple latex catsuit gyrating for the camera. It reminded him of Susan’s new look, and his cock stirred in his pants.
Without warning, the TV seemed to turn off for a few seconds, and when it turned back on instead of the action movie it now showed a blonde girl wearing a light blue dress, a man dressed in a green suit wearing a large green top hat, a strange-looking rabbit and a tiny mouse all seated around a very long table. Littered throughout the table were teapots, cups for tea, cakes, cakes and other deserts and other things all perfect for a tea party. Between the drugged cakes and the subliminal messages embedded in the TV, Johnny’s mind had a difficult time making sense of what he was seeing, but slowly but surely he recalled the story that Susan read many times as a little girl. Alice in Wonderland, and how a Mad Hatter had hosted a mad tea party. Johnny laughed as he watched the bizarre scene play out before him, and found that he actually preferred this to that dull action movie he had set out to watch just minutes before.
He shoved another cake in his mouth and his head tingled. Through his blurry, tired eyes he watched as the mouse...the Dormouse to be more precise recited a whimsical poem. The small little thing seemed to be drunk or something, and Johnny couldn’t help himself as he laughed lightly at the utter absurdity of it all. And all the while, the Mad Hatter seemed to direct the proceedings, and his mind quickly made the connection between the Mad Hatter on the screen and his new friend from the other world, Mr. Hatter.
It was all so...so WONDERful, he found.
Johnny reached over for another cake and grabbed it, holding it high in the air. The whimsical poem that the Dormouse had said was stuck in his head, and soon, words began to spill out of Johnny’s own mouth. He didn’t know where they came from. They just felt so right.
“Twinkle twinkle little John,
how I wonder where you’ve gone?
Up above the world you fly,
like a candle in the sky.”
A pleased smile formed on his face at the conclusion of his little ditty. He then opened his mouth extra wide and dropped the small cake.