After breakfast was over and the Fantastic Four went about cleaning the table, Reed announced to the group that he had to get going back to his laboratory. This came as no surprise to anyone, and Ben and Johnny naturally gave him an especially hard time. Reed ignored their friendly barbs and kissed Susan on the cheek before making his way to the Baxter Building’s main elevator. The double doors opened and soon, Mr. Fantastic was gone.
Jervis, for his part, stood to the side of this familial display and stewed quietly. Richards once more abandoned his wife in favor of his work. The very thought made his blood boil. Despite the utter contempt he felt for the man, Jervis maintained his composure and continued to play his role as the unsuspecting newcomer to this world to perfection. During the meal he kept quiet, seemingly taking in the disgustingly wholesome display by the Fantastic Four. The meal was dominated mostly by Ben and Johnny’s constant war of words, but even the demented villain could tell that the pair shared a long-standing friendship. He had to admit they were quite humorous and the Mad Hatter could help but imagine them with matching propeller beanies atop their heads like Tweedledum and Tweedledee…
“You know, boys,” Susan smiled at her brother and longtime friend, “You really should go easier on my husband. Without his important work and inventions, Fantastic Four Inc. would go out of business and you would be out on the streets.”
“Maybe rocks for brains here,” Johnny said smugly, “Then again, I’m sure Ben would be welcomed with opened arms by any circus or zoo. Me, on the other hand, have a whole phone full of Victoria Secret models’ numbers. I’d be fine.”
“Keep talkin’, Match-Head. One punch from me to dat pretty face uh-yer’s and you’ll be takin’ all yer meals through a straw. No model’ll take ya in then,” Ben Grimm gruffed, and cracked his knuckles.
Johnny walked over to Ben and placed a hand on his shoulder. His mouth curled up into a sly, half-smile and he said, “Do you really think I’m pretty?”
Alicia Masters burst out laughing at this, and Susan shook her head. The Invisible Woman cleared her throat to get Johnny’s attention, “Speaking of Fantastic Four, Inc., Johnny I think you should join me today at the offices. You can job shadow me and get to know how things are done.”
“And why would I want to do that?” Johnny asked.
“Because I gave you the open C.O.O. position last week,” Susan said, her tone was growing impatient.
“You were serious about that?” Johnny asked in a shocked tone.
“You did what, Susie?” Ben asked, his blue eyes nearly bugging out of his rocky skull, “Susie, I always thought you was a smart cookie, but givin’ corporate power tah Johnny Storm? Ya might as well file for bankruptcy right now!”
“Oh, Johnny, Ben is just jealous that you’re clearly corporate material,” Alicia Masters teased, much to the chagrin of the large rock man. He shook his head at his girlfriend who was still chuckling at her little joke.
“Thank you, Alicia. At least someone around here appreciates me,” Johnny smirked.
“I’m...um...certain Susan knows what she is doing,” came a voice from the side of the room. Susan, Johnny and Ben’s head all turned to its source. They had almost forgotten that Jervis Tetch was still in the room.
“Suck-up!” Johnny called out in what sounded like a cough with his hand over his mouth.
“That you for the support, Jervis,” Susan smiled over to the man, and then shot Johnny a look that told him to be nice, “And what are you up to today? Don’t tell me that you are going to be holed up in your own lab. We really can only have one workaholic lab rat in the Baxter Building at a time.”
“You’re right, Suan,” Jervis nodded, “I think I’ll get some fresh air today and do some sightseeing of your beautiful city. After all, who knows how long I’ll be here.”
“That is such wonderful news, Jervis. If you need anything, don’t hesitate to call the office. I gave you the number,” Susan smiled warmly. She was getting visibly excited that Johnny would be joining her and that Jervis felt comfortable enough to explore New York on his own, “I can’t wait to hear about it tonight when we get back. This really does have the makings of a wonderful day!” With that, she made her way to her and Reed’s room to get showered and dressed.
Johnny waited until Susan was out of earshot and declared to the group in a faux-dignified tone, “My friends. I must bid you all farewell. For today I die of boredom at the hands of my own sister.” He turned quickly and marched down the hallway to his own room.
Tetch was left with Ben and Alicia. There was awkward silence for a moment, when Jervis feigned as if he had remembered something. He stammered an apology and said that he needed to ask Johnny about something. Nearly tripping over his feet, the Fantastic Four’s guest hurried after the younger of the Storm siblings.
“He is strange,” Alicia murmured to Ben, who nodded slowly. Soon, the couple too left the common area.
“Johnny! Johnny!” Jervis called out, and the Human Torch rolled his eyes before turning around.
“What is it?” an irritated Johnny Storm asked, “You were so quiet at breakfast and now you want to chat? Sorry, man, but I don’t have a lot of time.”
Jervis’s heart nearly skipped a beat in his chest at the mention of time. The Mad Hatter reached into his pocket, quickly pulled out his pocket watch and opened the lid. Still playing the ever-nervous houseguest, Jervis stammered, “Hmmm, time, time. We all could certainly use more time, isn’t that right, Johnny?”
Johnny narrowed his eyes at Tetch and shook his head. He thought for a moment about addressing the bizarre comment, but instead continued to walk down the hallway.
Jervis suddenly called out frantically, “I’m sorry, Johnny. I get so distracted sometimes, but you said something before about that cat-burglar that robbed the museum. I heard you say ‘she finally did it.’ This leads me to think that you know the identity of this cat-burglar. Do you, sir?”
Johnny stopped in his tracks and rolled his eyes. The Johnny Storm that had been playfully teasing Ben Grimm was gone and in his place was the hot-head. The hero known throughout the world as the Human Torch turned slowly and said in an unmistakably agitated tone, “You heard that, did you?”
“I did,” Jervis answered, casting his eyes down. It was clear he was in trouble.
Johnny moved closer to the man threateningly, “Look, you’re our guest, and I’m sure what you’ve been through has been rough. I don’t know how they do things in your world, but in our world we don’t snoop on one another. We mind our own business. Is that clear?”
“Snoop? Snoop? Me, snooping? Oh, my dear Mr. Storm, you’re sadly mistaken,” Jervis said, shaking his head. His tone had become more confident, “By the way, do you hear my watch ticking?”
It was clear that Johnny had lost all patience for Tetch, and he was about to really let him have it when his words became stuck in his throat. A distressed look overtook his handsome features and he looked up at Jervis, “Yeah.” Johnny answered.
“Listen closer,” Jervis ordered and Johnny did just that. Jervis continued, and Johnny’s eyes grew sleepy. He stared straight ahead, “The way it’s ticking. Tick, tick, tick, yes. That’s it. The more it ticks the more relaxed you will become, Johnny. Now, look into my eyes.”
Johnny’s tired eyes tilted upwards so he was staring into Jervis’ cold, black eyes.
“Yes, that’s it. Look deep, deep into my eyes,” Tetch spoke, “You are completely relaxed and will do anything I say.”
Johnny nodded slowly, never breaking eye contact with Jervis Tetch.
“Johnny, you will reveal the identity of the cat-burglar from the news report to me,” Jervis commanded.
“Her real name is Felicia Hardy,” Johnny said in a complete monotone.
“Very good, Johnny. Now, as a reward for revealing the Cat’s identity, I will do something for you. Quid pro quo, quid pro quo. Today when you job shadow Susan, you will grow increasingly bored with every passing hour. After lunch you will excuse yourself wherever you are. You will say you will be right back, but instead you will go to the news station we were watching earlier this morning and find that pretty little anchor. Take her out for dinner, a night on the town, maybe even get a hotel room or go back to her place if it goes well. Just don’t take her back here. If Susan tries to call you ignore her calls. You will be too busy having too much fun with her.”
Sweat had begun to form on Johnny’s temples. The expression on his face had turned pained. It was clear he was trying to fight the hypnosis.
“You’re doing so well, Johnny. Keep listening to my watch and keep relaxing. That’s it,” the Mad Hatter commanded and Johnny breathed in deeply. His pained look vanished, and Jervis smiled, “Johnny, whenever I say ‘Callooh, Callay’ you will return to this same hypnotized state, and when you wake up you will have no memory of what I’ve said to you or the things I’ve had you do. You will think whatever you did was your decision and your decision alone. Is that clear?”
“Yes,” Johnny monotoned.
“One last thing, Johnny,” the Hatter added, “Susan will be going through some changes soon. Very, very soon. If anyone asks if you think her behavior as odd, you will think nothing of it. You will defend her. Susan’s decisions are her own after all. She can live her life however she chooses. Isn’t that right?”
“...Susan can live her life however she chooses…” Johnny repeated.
“Very good, Johnny,” Jervis Tetch smiled his twisted smile at the young hotshot, “Now, when I say ‘Happy Unbirthday’ you will leave this peaceful state. You will have no memory of what has just happened. You will go about your day just as I commanded you to do.”
The Mad Hatter paused for a moment, and was overjoyed that he had another member of the Fantastic Four under his power. He couldn’t wait for later that day when Susan came home. Johnny would abandon her, Reed would be holed up in his lab, Ben would be with Alicia and she would have no one to turn to except for him! And what a kind, understanding friend sweet, old Jervis would be. But there was so much to do, and so little time to do it in. He too needed to go on with his day. He looked back to Johnny.
“Happy unbirthday,” the Hatter spoke.